As summer unfurls its golden rays and the aroma of sunscreen becomes a staple, the anticipation of beach days and the pursuit of the elusive ‘swimsuit body’ intensify. This season, often portrayed in vibrant, carefree hues, can paradoxically usher in a period of profound self-scrutiny for many. Social pressures amplify as we peel off layers of clothing, and the quest to sculpt a summer-ready physique through diets and rigorous gym routines becomes almost a cultural ritual. Yet, amidst this bustle of self-improvement, a crucial question lingers: How comfortable do we truly feel in our own skin?
The journey between self-acceptance and the desire to be our best selves presents a complex landscape, marked by both societal expectations and personal aspirations. It’s a dance of balance—knowing when to push forward and when to stand still, appreciating our bodies for their functionality and beauty, regardless of how close they come to societal ideals. How much of our energy should be invested in enhancing our physical selves, and at what cost to our mental and emotional well-being?
In this context of reflection and renewal, I want to share a story that vividly encapsulates this struggle and eventual harmony between self-improvement and self-acceptance.
In a lush forest lived Rondo, a robust rhinoceros known for his mighty horn and sturdy frame. One summer day by a stream, Rondo encountered a unicorn, a creature of stunning grace with a shimmering mane and majestic horn. Mistaking it for another rhinoceros, Rondo admired its elegant form and decided to reshape himself to match this vision of beauty. He embarked on an intense regimen, striving to transform his powerful physique into something more refined.
Despite his efforts, Rondo’s body remained unchanged, leading him to view his strong features with growing disdain. ¨Why can I not be like him?¨ cried Rondo. The comparison with the unicorn stirred feelings of insecurity and ugliness, emotions that were unfamiliar to him before this encounter. His distress grew until one evening, Ella, a wise old elephant and his friend, noticed his sorrow. She reminded him, “Rondo, you are a rhinoceros, not a unicorn. Each creature has its strengths. Why not strive to be the best rhinoceros you can be, inspired to feel agile and elegant, but in your own way?”
Taking Ella’s words to heart, Rondo began to appreciate his unique qualities. He adapted his activities to enhance his natural strengths, focusing on health and agility suited to his form. Gradually, he learned to embrace his identity, finding peace in his own skin and the wisdom to celebrate his distinctive attributes.
In our quest for self-improvement, it’s vital to remember our unique strengths and limitations. Strive not to become a copy of another, but to be the best version of yourself, inspired by others but true to your nature.
With Rondo’s story in mind, let us delve deeper into how we can apply this lesson to our own lives, especially during the summer when the pressure to conform to certain aesthetic standards intensifies. It’s essential to strike a balance between the desire for self-improvement and the necessity of self-acceptance.
We all relish the sensation of feeling good—internally vibrant, healthy, active, agile, and pain-free. Similarly, there’s an undeniable pleasure in looking good, a desire that resonates with many of us. However, it’s crucial to remember that aesthetics are highly subjective. What remains objective, though, are the feelings of happiness, joy, and health. There is no one more radiant than a person who feels fulfilled, at peace, and in love with life.
To truly embrace these qualities, we must first accept who we are. This includes acknowledging our personal stories and physical features, understanding that none are inherently better or worse than another’s. Acceptance also extends to our circumstances—where we stand in life’s journey. From this foundation of acceptance, we can aim to mold ourselves into who we wish to be, but without self-deceit. Pretending to love our bodies when we do not, or feigning health when we are unwell, serves no purpose. Instead, it’s about nurturing our discipline, setting realistic goals, cultivating healthy habits, and learning to let go of things beyond our control while savouring each day and the opportunities it brings. These opportunities may vary greatly from one person to another, but they define who we are at this moment.
Change is a constant possibility in our lives, yet some aspects will remain as they are, and accepting this reality is key to achieving peace. Peace allows us to connect deeply with our hearts, helping us to discern our true desires, including how we want to be and, potentially, how we wish to look—if that is what our heart tells us. If not, then we should feel free to relax and cast aside worries. Judging ourselves or others serves no purpose other than to detract from the joy of living.
It’s important to realise that our self-perception deeply influences how others perceive us. The path to being genuinely liked and appreciated by others begins with loving and accepting ourselves. When we harbour negative judgments towards ourselves, it not only diminishes our own well-being but also sets the tone for how others relate to us. If we are constantly critical of ourselves, we inadvertently teach others to focus on our flaws. Conversely, when we embrace our own qualities and imperfections, we invite others to do the same. This acceptance creates a more positive, supportive interaction with the world around us. The less we judge ourselves, the more open we become to accepting love and respect from others, fundamentally changing the nature of our relationships and enhancing our overall happiness.
This summer, let us not be swayed by the ubiquitous pressures to conform to unrealistic standards. Instead, embrace the season with an open heart. Enjoy the warmth of the sun, the refreshing embrace of the water, and the simple pleasures of being alive. This is your moment to revel in a human experience filled with rich sensory experiences, each one worthy of being fully lived.
Humans are unique among living creatures due to our self-awareness, which manifests profoundly through our physical bodies—the instruments through which we experience life. While all living beings interact with their environments, humans have the distinct advantage of being conscious of these interactions. We possess the gift of five physical senses that allow us to see the beauty of the sunset, feel the warmth of the sand under our feet, taste the saltiness of the ocean, hear the laughter of friends, and smell the fresh scent of summer blooms. What a marvelous reason to appreciate and cherish our bodies! Let go of the quest for perfection. Instead, celebrate the incredible capacity of your body to provide a gateway to these myriad life experiences, enriching your every experience and connecting you deeply to the world around you. This appreciation can transform ordinary moments into extraordinary memories and deepen your gratitude for the simple act of living. Do you really think your beautiful and amazing body deserves your judgement your demanding your lack of appreciation? You are a team, your mind, your spirit and your body. One doesn’t thrive without the other and each help the other. Nurture it, take care of it, love it, appreciate it.
Forget about getting caged on society’s ways of commercialising with it and objectify it.
Each step forward, no matter how small, is a part of a larger journey towards a fulfilled and joyful life. Enjoy the summer, and let it be a season of growth, peace, and abundant happiness. As you walk this path, remember that personal development and self-acceptance are not just seasonal tasks but ongoing processes that enrich every aspect of your being. Allow this summer to be a time when you not only pursue your goals but also learn to value the beauty of the present moment. Embrace the opportunity to slow down, reflect, and connect with your inner self and with others around you in meaningful ways. Let this be a time of renewal and joyful discovery, where each day offers a chance to celebrate life, deepen your understanding of yourself, and spread positivity in your community. Here’s to a summer filled with love, laughter, and the kind of deep, satisfying happiness that comes from truly living in tune with yourself.
By Lorena Bernal
This text was used in Yoga Magazine (UK)